Work Troubles

“I’m glad I called CALM when I did. If I hadn’t, I don’t know what I would have done next – but I’d have been in an even worse mess I’m sure.

Sarah is my two year-old daughter and I love her more than anything. I really settled down when she was born – tried hard to make things work with my girlfriend and finally managed to hold down a half decent job. The work was boring, but I worked shifts so the money was good. Becoming a father made me realise that I needed to keep the cash coming in – for Sarah’s sake.

Then I was made redundant. I hadn’t been there long enough to get much of a pay off and what I did get didn’t last us very long. My girlfriend was worried about keeping a roof over our heads and our relationship became strained – she nagged me constantly about getting another job.

Looking back, I was definitely angry that just when I’d thought life was going OK, somebody had dropped one on me from a great height, but there was no one to blame – it was really frustrating. Instead of going out looking for work, I started going down the pub. I only had a couple of beers in the afternoon to start with, but before I knew it I wouldn’t be able to remember what time, or how, I’d got home.

Then my girlfriend left me, taking Sarah with her, and threatening that she wouldn’t let me see her again. She said I was an unfit father – that hurt, and I think that was when I really hit rock bottom. I couldn’t get out of bed until I’d had a drink and was borrowing money all over the place, to help pay the bills.

I just felt desperate, and called CALM. I needed a release. I’d picked up a beermat with a helpline number on it in a bar one night. I didn’t really know what I was going to say, but the bloke on the end of the line really helped. He just listened and didn’t judge me. Somehow, talking to somebody that I didn’t know, was easier than talking face-to-face.

He told me about who I could talk to and get help with sorting my life out, and about other organisations that could provide support for my drinking and give me information about getting out of debt. He helped me see that I had choices, and that I could make them – if I wanted to. It seems strange that over the course of a 30-minute phone call I probably opened up more to a stranger than I ever had to anyone in my life.

12 months on I’m half sorted. I’ve got another job that’s OK and I just drink mainly at the weekends. The best thing is I’ve got Sarah back. Her mother and I aren’t back together, but we’re talking, and I get to see Sarah every weekend.

I do feel lonely sometimes, particularly during the week, and I have called CALM again a couple of times when I’ve been feeling really low. It just helps knowing there’s somebody out there to listen and support me if I need it again in the future.”