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FIRST PERSON: I lost my best friend

“Its been 4 weeks since I lost my best friend to depression. Or to be precise 33 days and around 18 hours. In that time I have felt unimaginable grief, uncontrollable rage, despairing emptyness, and then a kind of numbness covering all this, holding it inside.

As a sufferer of depression myself, he and I were more than friends, we were soul mates, depression buddies, each others pep talkers and secret keepers. Now he’s left me I have to do this all on my own, and it feels like a part of me is missing.

But today I decided I can turn this around. He didn’t do this because he wanted me to join him (and I thought about it ALOT), he did it so that I would realise there is more to life than myself. There is him. He represents so many men around the country and world, suffering and not able or willing to ask for help.

Maybe it was pride, maybe embarrassment, or maybe he just felt there was no way out of his own dark cloud. He is pure light now, and it is my job to help the Matt’s of this world, one step at a time. If the work I do helps one person then Matt won’t have died in vain.”

If you want to join the campaign against living miserably and help prevent male suicide click HERE

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