I'm walking to let people know there's help out there: Lily's Lost Hours Walk

Every October, when the clocks go back, we walk forwards against suicide for the Lost Hours Walk. Wherever you are, and whether you’ve lost someone to suicide, struggled yourself, or want to smash the silence around suicide in the UK, be part of it.

Lily’s walking in memory of her brother Sean, who she lost to suicide. She’s hoping her family can use the Lost Hour as time to support one another and talk honestly about how they feel.

After she lost her brother, walking gave Lily space to reflect on things and helped her to leave the house during a really tough time. Lily is taking part in the Lost Hours Walk with her family, walking for Sean and doing something positive in his memory.

“It’s been difficult to spend time as a family without it being shadowed with sadness since losing Sean. I’d like for us to have time away from the usual formalities, where we have the opportunity to take a deep breath, bring some positivity to my brother’s memory and support his belief in being open and honest about how we feel.”

For the family, the Lost Hours Walk isn’t just a chance to raise money and awareness for CALM, it’s also a time for them to get together and talk. Lily says:

“I’d like it to become an annual event for my family and friends, where we have time to remember my brother."

"There’s something quite special about walking in the lost hour. It makes you feel like you can forget polite conversation, like saying you’re fine when you’re not. It gives us space to say how we’re really doing.”

Lily’s fundraising for CALM’s life-saving services because she knows how valuable they are in helping people like her brother. She’s doing the Lost Hours Walk to raise money and awareness for the webchat - something she thinks her brother would have found more accessible than picking up the phone. Lily’s keen to show that there are lots of ways to ask for help if you’re struggling:

“I was looking for places that opened up conversations for people who needed someone to talk to. It was important to me to find more options than a phone helpline, because I know from experience that a helpline isn’t always accessible for everybody in their time of need. My brother used to talk about how he felt on Whatsapp rather than on a call, so it’s important there are different options when it comes to asking for help.”

Lily and her family will be walking for Sean, but also walking to show anyone else finding life tough that they’re not alone:

“Sean had a long battle with his mental health and was very ill for a number of years. If anybody else is having that long-term battle, I want them to know they’re not a worst case scenario, there are other people who feel the same and there’s still help out there.”

Persuading a team to take on the Lost Hours Walk, Lily wants to help give her family and Sean’s friends something positive to aim for, bringing some hope to a difficult time:

“The Lost Hours Walk gives our family the opportunity to get out of the house, because if you have something to aim for it’s easier to step outside. It’s the perfect challenge to do in Sean’s name, because he always wanted to help people when they were struggling by providing a safe space.”

Lily’s hoping the Lost Hours Walk will help her family with the grieving process and that training will help give them a reason to leave the house. Lily knows the difference getting out for some fresh air can make, turning to walking while grieving for her brother:

“Whether I'm walking alone for 10 minutes on my lunch break, or planning a 10k walk with somebody, walking definitely has benefits. When I first lost my brother, I found it really hard to leave the house, but I noticed that on the days I'd get out, even just for a small walk around the block, it became a better day.

“Breaking up the day and getting outside for fresh air makes such a difference. It's such a small act but I feel like it really did help give me that space and time to make better sense of my thoughts.”

Lily wants the walk to allow her family room to grieve and reflect on what they’ve been through, she hopes that the Lost Hours Walk can become the safe space which Sean always tried to provide:

“Moving forwards, it’s really important to me to become a similar role in people’s lives and to give that same support to people that my brother did. Sean was always happy to be someone you could offload to, he would say ‘don’t apologise for how you feel, let’s talk about it’.

“The Lost Hours Walk provides a place to open up and have conversations that aren’t easy, that’s why I’ll be spreading the message about CALM. You don’t know who’s struggling, so it would be nice to reach people who might be finding things difficult.”

Sign up for this year’s Lost Hours Walk, take steps to save lives and walk against suicide this October. Wherever you are in the UK, you can help smash the silence around suicide by creating your own lost Hours Walk. Find out more.