27th October 2022

Why Big Boys writer Jack Rooke is making comedy to help beat loneliness

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We caught up with our old friend Jack Rooke - comedian, writer and long-time CALM ambassador, to hear why he’s making comedy to help beat loneliness and how he’s using humour to address the awkwardness of being human.

You might know Jack as the writer and narrator of the critically acclaimed comedy series Big Boys. If you’ve not seen it, the witty series shows the ups and downs of Jack’s time at uni - those clunky first few days trying to make mates, the terrible freshers-induced hangovers and going through difficult stuff when you’re away from home.

With a new series on the horizon, we thought it was the perfect time to catch up with Jack about all things mental health and how the show addresses grief, depression and other tough topics.

Jack sees comedy as a chance to do something good, to break down those tricky topics that a lot of us struggle to talk about. He wants to make heavy problems less scary, by making them funny:

“Humour is always the best vehicle for knocking down those awkward barriers that people have in talking about more difficult issues. Comedy makes those subjects more accessible to people and it enables you to write characters that people can relate to and empathise with.”

He hopes everyone can find a character they connect with, because he knows that leaving home for the first time can be a really lonely experience.

“Leaving for uni can be lonely for many people - you’re trying to fend for yourself, making shit pesto pasta and dealing with all the crap that happens when you finally leave home. I wanted to use humour to help people realise it doesn’t have to be lonely, because loads of people go through that too.”

Jack’s learned that friends, family and finding your crowd can be an invaluable support when you’re struggling. Since coming out, he’s found a community of people who have struggled with the same things:

“There’s a wider community of queer people who understand those homophobic microagressions that exist in society and all the odd administrative things that queer people have to go through. The small prejudices become much easier to deal with when you put yourself in a bigger community and you make more friends within that.”

Talking can make us feel less alone in whatever we’re facing and it’s something that Jack does a lot in his work.

Grief has never been a topic he’s shied away from, and he talks openly about loss and the impact it’s had on him. Losing his dad when he was a teenager and later losing a friend to suicide has fuelled Jack’s work with CALM:

“I like to work with CALM as much as I can, because there’s no quick route to seeking justice for someone lost to suicide. It’s about having these conversations and trying to shift society’s view on mental illness and trying to get better services for people in crisis."

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Jack knows that losing someone this way is incredibly difficult and wants to share what he’s found helpful:

“My advice to anyone bereaved by suicide is not to live in fear. It’s so easy, once you know one person who’s taken their own life, to worry about that happening to other people when they’re having a tough time. It’s a sort of trauma response and it creates a paranoia that it could happen again because you know easily it can happen.

“I don’t believe that there’s ever one reason why somebody takes their own life, there’s often a whole host of reasons. It’s important to remember to still find a way to celebrate the person you’ve lost.”

Like lots of people, Jack’s frustrated by the lack of support for people in crisis. He wants there to be wider awareness when it comes to mental wellbeing and it’s why he’s so passionate about talking about it in his work:

“Mental illness is something that people chemically go through and deal with, you know, it’s very innate inbuilt stuff that can start at any point in someone’s life. We’re constantly underestimating the environmental and societal factors that are contributing to so many mental health problems.

“So many of the tools and coping mechanisms that we tell people will help are becoming more and more inaccessible. Eighty or ninety quid a week for therapy isn’t affordable when we’re in a cost of living crisis. We need to try to expand mental health services, to speed up waiting times, especially when people are at crisis point and need extra support.”

Jack’s doing what he can as a writer to help break down this stuff in his comedy, encouraging more people to talk and showing that you’re not alone in whatever you’re going through.

“I think this silly university comedy deals with heavier issues, but ultimately, all of those characters are really nice to one another. It’s a slightly idealistic world I’m trying to portray, where we look out for one another when we’re going through tough times.”

Jack’s sworn to secrecy, but keep your eyes peeled for the next series of Big Boys, which will be out very soon.

Whatever you’re going through, we have loads of useful things to help you in the CALM Guides if you’re struggling. Or if you need to talk to someone, our helpline and webchat is open every day from 5pm until midnight.