Paired Muscle Relaxation DBT Skill

If you’re tense, stressed, or feeling the squeeze… it’s time to SQUEEZE. This tool is super effective at helping you to let go of tension and the feelings weighing you down. Essentially, you squeeze a group of muscles as hard as you can before slowly releasing the tension. It’s a top way to show your body how much better it feels when it learns to just let it goooo.

The big contrast of tension and full body relaxation feels amazing too. And because your body can’t be both super tense and deeply relaxed, you’re basically forcing yourself into a more chill state. It also helps you to redirect your focus away from negative or challenging thoughts and into the present. Watch - and probably laugh - at cyclists Bradley and Ben Wiggins trying this DBT technique out.

Get the most out of the Paired Muscle Relaxation skill

WHAT

Alternating between tensing and relaxing different muscle groups and pairing the relaxation with a calming cue word like relax, peace or sandwich (whichever one works for you).

Tense a group of muscles for about 5–10 seconds, then slowly release the tension over 10–15 seconds. Start with the top of your body and then keep doing this with your arms, your abdominal and back muscles, your bottom muscles, thighs and upper legs and calves.

As you’re doing it mentally repeat your calming word "relax… relax… relax" as you let go. Soon you’ll have relaxed your whole body.

WHY

There are loads of benefits to this technique. It helps lower your heart rate - and, as the name suggests, the process reduces your muscle tension so you feel more relaxed and able to deal with the stress you’re facing. It also makes you more aware of the physical tension you’re feeling and where it’s located in your body - so you can release tension you might not have even noticed before.

WHERE

You can do it anywhere - school, work, at home. And you can do it from a seated position.