THE LANGUAGE OF LISTENING
You know what it’s like. Your mate is struggling but you’re not quite sure what the right thing to do or say is. iI feels a bit awkward. But it doesn’t need to be.
We’re working with our mates at SEAT to say that If you think someone is struggling, don’t always accept “I’m fine”. “I’m fine” is a silence filler. A black hole of a phrase used to reassure people and not really reveal anything. It’s the most told lie you tell your mates, right next to: “I’ll be 5 minutes” when they ask you where you are.
But we also know that when a mate is finding things tough, it is difficult to know what to do to help. It can be tempting to brush it off and not ask in case things get awkward. That’s why we’ve joined forces with SEAT for “The Language of Listening”, a series of hints and tips that make it easier to talk about the stuff that really matters.
Take a look through the films and hopefully you’ll find something in there that will help next time your mate is ready to open up about something they’re dealing with.
Most importantly, remember to listen to what they’re saying, let them know you’re there for them, be available and trust your instincts.
At CALM we know that mental health chat is filled with cliches, euphemisms and stereotypes that don’t help. We’re trying to fight against that and break down the stigmas so people can be honest and let their mates know how they really feel. But the truth is that many of us are still just sticking to a script and not scratching below the surface. In fact, only 55% of men experiencing depression will let anyone know about it* and 84% of men say they bottle up their emotions**
Be honest, when was the last time you asked a mate not just how they were doing but, you know, how they were really doing? Sitting down and checking in with other people isn’t just a tick box exercise, it can literally be a lifesaver.
Episode 3 ‘No distractions’