CALM’s Guide to coping with persistent suicidal thoughts
Persistent suicidal thoughts are thoughts about taking your own life that stay with you over a long period of time - sometimes weeks, months, or even years.
A suicidal thought is a thought about taking your own life or not being around anymore.
They can range from fleeting thoughts that appear briefly, to more intense or detailed thoughts about suicide. Find out more about suicidal thoughts here.
Persistent suicidal thoughts are thoughts about taking your own life that come up again and again over time.
You might also hear them described as:
chronic suicidal thoughts
passive suicidal thoughts
persistent suicidal ideation
They can feel like a default setting in your mind that you can't switch off. The thoughts might appear frequently, suddenly, or only during certain moments, but keep coming back over time.
Persistent suicidal thoughts might involve a general wish to be not be alive, or a belief that others would be better off without you. This is sometimes described as passive suicidal thoughts.
These thoughts can exist without an immediate plan or intention to act on them, but they can still feel overwhelming and distressing. For some people, suicidal thoughts can even bring a strange sense of comfort when things feel extremely painful or difficult to cope with.
Experiencing suicidal thoughts does not mean someone will go on to take their own life or act on their thoughts. There is nothing wrong with you if you experience recurring or persistent suicidal thoughts.
Many people experience suicidal thoughts at some point in their lives. Having thoughts that return over time does not mean you are a failure, and support is available if you're struggling. You can talk to CALM from 5pm to midnight every day if you're struggling with persistent suicidal thoughts.
Anyone can experience persistent suicidal thoughts. For some people, they may appear regularly for weeks or months. For others, they may return on and off over many years.
Research has shown that many people experience suicidal thoughts for extended periods of time. One study found that 22.1% of participants reported persistent suicidal ideation.
While persistent suicidal thoughts aren’t uncommon, getting support from a professional can help you navigate them. You don’t have to face persistent suicidal thoughts alone.
Experiencing persistent suicidal thoughts can feel heavy - like carrying a burden you can't shake off.
Sometimes people feel frightened of the thoughts returning, even during periods when they feel okay. This can create anxiety about when the thoughts might appear again.
It can also be difficult to talk about suicidal thoughts that keep coming back, especially if you have opened up about them before.
Some people have shared feelings like:
“I felt like a failure, like them coming back was something I'd done wrong.”
“I felt scared about what was going to happen.”
“I felt isolated. I didn't want my family to have to go through it all again.”
“I felt angry. Why was my brain doing this to me again?”
All of these feelings are valid. If you're experiencing persistent suicidal thoughts, speaking to someone who understands can really help. While it might feel hard to open up, it can be like releasing a pressure valve - taking the power away from the thoughts and giving you more control.
Unsure? You can talk to our professional staff for practical advice between 5pm and midnight every day.
It can feel frustrating or confusing to have suicidal thoughts that keep returning - especially if you have already worked hard to improve your mental health.
There isn't a single reason why people experience persistent suicidal thoughts. Often, they are connected to deep emotional pain, long-term stress, or difficult life experiences.
Sometimes these thoughts can become a pattern the brain falls back on when someone feels overwhelmed — almost like a mental reflex during moments of distress.
Persistent suicidal thoughts are rarely caused by just one event. They are often linked to longer-term struggles or challenges.
Some experiences that can contribute include:
emotional numbness or emptiness
feeling deeply lonely or isolated
feeling worthless or like you don't belong
losing a sense of purpose or meaning
withdrawing from people or activities you once enjoyed
sleep problems or exhaustion
increased use of alcohol, drugs, or self-harm to cope with pain
For some people, persistent suicidal thoughts can begin to feel like part of who they are.
But suicidal thoughts do not define someone. They are a signal that something in your life may need care, support, and attention.
Suicidal thoughts can sometimes feel like they will never go away. Experiencing them again - whether it's the second time or the hundredth - can feel discouraging.
But persistent suicidal thoughts are a sign of distress, not a personal failure or an inevitable future.
Research suggests that suicidal thoughts are often linked to how the brain responds to stress, trauma, and low mood. They can become patterns that appear more strongly during difficult moments.
Progress doesn't always mean the thoughts disappear completely. Sometimes progress looks like:
the thoughts appearing less often
the thoughts feeling less intense
the thoughts taking up less space in your day
These changes still matter.
Simple skills like grounding techniques, naming your feelings, or acknowledging a thought and letting it pass can sometimes reduce the intensity of these experiences.
For example, you might notice the thought and say to yourself:
"This is that thought again."
This can create a little distance between you and the thought itself.
Over time, practicing coping skills and seeking support can help your brain respond differently to difficult emotions and situations.
You don't have to deal with persistent suicidal thoughts alone. Talking to someone - whether it's a friend, a helpline, or a mental health professional - can help you feel less isolated and find ways to cope.
Nobody can completely control every thought that enters their mind. But there are things you can do to create distance from suicidal thoughts and cope when they appear.
Some people find it helpful to:
Focus on basic needs like regular sleep, eating when you can, and gentle movement. Small routines can help create stability.
Even small choices, like what to wear or when to go outside, can help rebuild a sense of control.
Try noticing the thought without immediately reacting to it. You might remind yourself:
"That's my stress talking, not the whole of who I am."
Activities that fully engage your mind can help interrupt spirals of thinking. This could include exercise, listening to music, or focusing on a hobby.
You’re not alone. There are lots of people and organisations that can support you and therapies and tools to help you cope. Speaking to your GP is a good first step, or you can talk to helplines like CALM.
Saying how you feel out loud can relieve some of the pressure and help you feel less alone.
Talking about persistent suicidal thoughts can feel different from talking about a crisis.
Sometimes you might simply need someone to listen and understand, rather than immediately try to solve the problem.
If you're worried about how someone might react, it can help to explain what you need. For example:
“I want to talk about something I've been struggling with. I'm not in immediate danger, but I need someone to listen.”
Opening up can feel difficult, but sharing how you're feeling can help you feel supported.
If someone shares persistent suicidal thoughts with you:
Try to listen with compassion rather than panic. Stay as calm as you can and listen to what they have to say. Often being truly heard can make all the difference.
Encourage them to speak to their GP or a mental health professional, and share helplines or services that might help. You could offer to help them reach out and make that first step.
Reliability, honesty, and patience can help someone feel safer opening up.
Even if you don't fully understand what they are feeling, their experience is real and deserves to be heard.
If you think someone is in immediate danger, call 999.
You don't have to face persistent suicidal thoughts alone.
You can:
Talk to CALM's helpline from 5pm to midnight every day
Call the Samaritans on 116 123
Speak to your GP about how you're feeling
Self-refer to NHS Talking Therapies
Last reviewed and updated: March 2026
