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Tackle it as a team
Tips and tactics to make your club a
Caring United one

Football is about being part of something. A reason to get together, do what you love and feel better for it. And for many of us that day of training or the big matchday is the highlight of our week. And even after the final whistle blows we want to make sure that we’re all there for each other too.

So we’ve put together this extra bit of kit, so that whoever’s struggling, whatever you’re facing, on, and off the pitch, you tackle it as a team.

Here are some tactics to help you and your team look out for each other. For the captains and gaffers, the refs and the right backs - everyone who makes the game happen.

*This Playbook is brought to you by the team at Campaign Against Living Miserably.


Right, let’s kick off…

1. Squad #Goals

Remember all squads are different – the people who make up your squad all have different needs, and nobody knows them better than you. Listen to everyone – the quiet ones often have the most to say, make sure you include them and see how they’re doing.

TIP:

Make it clear your squad is open and inclusive - so players feel free to say if they’re struggling and know they’ll get support

Give them something to smile about

Who doesn’t like a laugh?

You know that feeling when someone messages you out of the blue with a joke they think you’ll appreciate, or to remind you of a hilarious thing you did once, it’s nice huh?

Just because you know someone is having a hard time, doesn’t mean your messages have to be heavy. A little laughter goes a long way when you’re feeling crap, so send a message to let someone know you’re thinking about them, ask them over for a movie, or just send them something you found funny today. It might just turn their day around.

2. Tackle it as a team

You’re all one team – the only way to get through tough games is by standing together. So ask each other how you’re doing, have a Whatsapp group that’s a place to keep each other going, even in the tough times. Don’t leave anyone out. Look beyond someone's 'game face', try and see, or understand what might be going on below the surface.

TIP:

If you notice someone who seems isolated, make an effort to get them involved without drawing attention to them.

Keep an eye out: Some signs that show they might be struggling

We can all be masters of disguise when we want to be, smiling and nodding in social situ’s to cover up what’s really going on. It’s not always easy to know when someone is feeling shit, but here’s some stuff to look out for:

  • Ups and downs in their mood

  • Wanting to hang out less

  • Changes to their routine, like sleeping and eating

  • Seeming flat or low on energy

  • Neglecting themselves, showering less, or caring less about their personal appearance

  • Seeming reckless or making rash decisions

  • Increased alcohol or drug abuse

  • Being more angry or irritable than usual

  • Talking about suicide/wanting to die in a vague or joking way

  • Giving away their possessions

  • Saying goodbye to friends and family as if they won’t see them again

3. Teams talk

We always say it: but talking really does help. SO make sure communication isn’t limited to Down The Line and In To Feet. Start a conversation with your players, ask them how they’re doing, listen, be there - don't take ’I’m fine’ for an answer. Create times when you can all get together away from footy and have a chat.

TIP:

Listening is important. Be open to people and ask them open-ended questions. And if they do mention something, check-in with them next week. Take an interest and remember what someone has got going on in their life.

GO AHEAD AND ASK

Sometimes the best thing you can do is say it as you see it.

Too often, we shy away from digging a little deeper because we don’t like to think that our friend is sad. But avoiding the subject all together, can make someone feel even more isolated or silly for feeling the way they do.

The truth is, no matter how much banter your mate might throw at you, whether they’re the life and soul of the party, or always seem to be smiling – anyone can struggle with their mental health and anyone can feel suicidal.

Mostly it’s about listening and giving them space to chat. Let your friend know you’re worried about them and that they can talk to you in confidence. Don’t try and fix things, pretend to know how they feel, or convince them how lucky they are. Instead, allow them time to talk, ask questions like “how does that make you feel?” and reassure them that these feelings aren’t permanent and support is available.

Remember that everyone is different and what one person might breeze through, another may find more challenging.

4. Sign-post

Remember, you're not expected to have all the answers: as a coach or manager you’re not expected to be a mental health expert. If someone feels like they’ve hit a wall, be there to let them know it’s ok to take a break. That things can change, no matter how they’re feeling right now.

We also want you to have the confidence to support your players and let them know that specialist help is available when needed. If you recognise that one of your squad is struggling then point them in the direction of the support that they need.

TIP:

At CALM we’re always here to help - let people know they can talk to us. Put posters up in the clubhouse, near the pitch, everywhere. Share our details in the whatsapp group.

5. Celebrations

We don’t just mean a Klinnsman in the rain or a Shearer salute: celebrations are always important. Enjoying the moment, the victories you have. We’re all about being against living miserably and finding that time to have a laugh.

TIP:

Find time to get together and have a laugh and celebrate wins big and small - that outlet can make all the difference.

6. Community

Football brings us together. And we know It’s not just the players - it’s everyone around the club. The people helping run the team, giving lifts to away games, those who put a plate of food in front of you or a pint in your hand in the clubhouse after you’ve been playing in the pouring rain for 90 minutes.

It’s this community around the team that makes it special. And being part of a community can have a really positive effect on your mental health, giving you a feeling of belonging.

TIP:

Make sure those who aren’t playing feel like an important part of the team too.

So that’s the Playbook. There are always going to be those rivalries, those injuries that make you limp for the rest of the week, and those 50-50’s in the middle of the park, but this is More Than a Game. This is about us all standing together as a Caring United team. And you’ll be doing it with CALM on your side..