“I feel under pressure to buy gifts for friends and family, but I can barely make my bills this month.”
If the countdown to Christmas has been marked by anxiously checking your bank balance, you’re not alone.
It can feel like there’s a lot of pressure to spend – there’s the expensive socials, food and the bills that come with being home more - but no Christmas should come at the cost of your mental wellbeing.
The holidays can be brutal on our hard-earned pennies, but being honest with your friends and family about what you can realistically afford is a great place to start. Most people will understand, and many will even be relieved to have an honest conversation about Christmas cash. Chances are, lots of them will be in the same boat.
A memorable Christmas doesn’t have to be all about the gifts. Swap exchanging presents for chipping into an experience to do together instead, swap the present splurge for a secret Santa, or bin off the pressies completely and put your focus into enjoying the day, whatever that means for you and the people you spend it with.
“I lost someone and I’m worried about how I’ll feel without them there”
Big dates can bring up big feelings after losing someone and celebrations can make it all the more obvious who’s missing from the table. This time of year can really amplify difficult emotions and you don’t need to have recently lost someone to struggle, the holidays can churn up a lot.
Just because there’s celebrations going on doesn’t mean you have to put on a different face either. It’s totally okay to make space to grieve and acknowledge what you’re going through. It’s also normal to feel a big range of stuff from anger to intense sadness.
Spend the time in whatever way feels right to you. Maybe that means stepping away from the usual traditions or starting some new ones in their memory. You could take a moment to chat about your favourite memories with them, raise a toast, or just take some time to quietly reflect on things.
Looking to the new year can be overwhelming too. If you’re struggling check out our guide to dealing with grief, or find support after suicide here.